I've been reading up on the recent economic stimulus package and all I ever hear about is the tax relief that it's going to bring to consumers, the money they're going to give consumers, as well as the money it's going to pump into the economy and how it might, possibly, help reverse an economic recession.

Reverse a recession? Really?

Well, that sounds all well and good, but ... $600 for everyone? $1,200 for families? Look, I understand that the economy is pretty damn important, but this is pumping more money directly into the economy - money we don't have.

It's like when a rich white guy has to apologize for being a jackass and he writes a check to make everything magically better.

I guess this is George Bush's way of apologizing a for fucking up a perfectly healthy economy. "Sorry I'm a moron, here's some money."

Here's the problem: the government isn't going to give you money it already has. We're broke, we have no money. Instead, the government is going to print more money to give you money. That means inflation, weakened value in the dollar (it'll hit parity with the yen in a week at this pace), and less buying power.

How ignorant do you have to be to think that an economic stimulus package is going to reverse a recession? There's a recession coming because we don't have any money! We owe trillions of dollars to foreign interests, the dollar is practically worthless, and now we want to print more fake worthless money to prop up an economy that is weak because our fake money is worthless?

I'd rather the government just give me a Play-Doh set. At least that's edible.

The only thing this economic stimulus package is going to stimulate are a bunch of politicians dicks.